[Channel Open]
[Incoming Transmission from Psi Phi, Office of Communications]

Minutes

(02/28/2001)

Call To Order: 10:04 pm

There were 14 attendees.

Notes:

At 10:09, Carl arrives, and is met with applause.
At 10:14, Marisa arrives; she is promptly and mysteriously attacked by a chair.
Light applause for Aaron occurs, deemed by David as a small reenactment of last week's more thunderous sort.
[Item deleted from the minutes for security reasons. As usual, Adam said it.]
The Comm Officer randomly starts speaking in tongues. This is deemed to be the work of a demon, who promptly left upon arrival, seeing that its help was not needed here.

Recruitment and Relations Committee:

David graciously repeats some information the Comm Officer missed last week.
Alumnus Jay Johnson is now working as a system administrator in Lockport, Illinois. Hi, Jay!

No Report Committee:

Adam delivers the report via a goofy parody of the Oompa-Loompa song.
No report. Scattered applause is detected.
The Captain orders Ray to hurt Adam. Because he is not yet officially Constable, Ray can't bap Adam with the bapper, but he can still shoot him with the phaser; he does so.

Communications Officer:

The Comm Officer reports that he sent out an e-mail to the club, which only he and the Chief got, since he didn't send it from the proper address.
The message dealt with encouraging people to attend tonight's meeting and vote on the amendment currently awaiting ratification. Since enough people came, it's essentially a moot point.
The problem will be corrected, and the Comm Officer is put to shame once again.
Member Ray Kremer recently submitted a letter to the editors of the Scout regarding promotion of the Anaga. The article is read and applauded.
It is remarked that promotion for the Anaga is "worsely organized than B-CON."
The suggestion is made that a book be made, "Ray Kremer - Letters to the Editor," in which the several years' worth of funny and insightful comments Ray has written and sent to the Scout would be compiled.
Chris Johnson cannot be here tonight, but he sends an absentee vote of "yes" on the amendment proposal. He also reports that they talked about Star Trek V in SOC 421 this week.
Movies mentioned in this week's SF Honors seminar included A Clockwork Orange, Sandpetals, Casablanca, Time Bandits, and Forbidden Planet, with Leslie Nielsen playing a strong guy who's not too bright.
Leslie Nielsen is William Shatner - who knew?
Amy's recently submitted proof of Joel equaling the empty set will not be included in the minutes due to the use of circular reasoning, although all agree that the statement is still essentially true.

Grand Nagus:

The current balance is $387.88, after Amy repays the Nagus. She pays the last cent as 180,000,000,000/18,000,000,000,000ths. Ray shoots Amy.

Chief of Operations:

First Officer:

This week's Douglas Adams Quote of the Week:
From Mostly Harmless, the quote begins, "'What the hell,' he said." (The rest went by too fast for the Comm Officer to record, but it's somewhere in the book.)
The First Officer leaves to do homework and votes "yes" on the amendment proposal via absentee ballot.
Carl nominates himself Acting First Officer.
Marisa's cat has had kittens, and she wants to know if anyone wants one. Adam's reply: "How do they taste?" Ray shoots Adam.

Captain:

The Captain orders Amy, Meg, and Kenny bapped by Ray.
Ray sings the "Letters" song.
Mail:
- An application for ACBU coordinator
- The Bradley University Educational and Developmental Programming Guide for 2001, with corresponding memo
- Phone numbers provided in the preceding item include those dealing with hazing and depression.
The group wonders if we can order a hazing for Adam. (What?)
"Ooh, depression, that's useful!"
The Nagus has much fun with the guide.

Specific disorder ensues about brain lobes.
Chanting begins: "Kirk! Kirk! Kirk!" "Vote! Vote! Vote!"
The amended amendment is approved and ratified 15-0, with 13 present voting "aye," and two affirmative absentee votes.
As per the amendment, nominations for a Constable take place.
Ray, Aaron, Joelish, Carl, and Kenny are nominated. Greedo and the door are nominated, but the nominations are not recognized.
David seconds all nominations.
The Captain denies Amy a nomination.
Voting is as follows: Ray-13, Aaron-0, Joelish-0, Carl-0, Kenny-0. Ray wins! Congratulations Ray!
Aaron says, "What?"
It is hereby noted that there were no abstentions in the vote -- not even Charlie. Loud applause follows.
Specific disorder ensues as Amy and Charlie talk about obscure MCS mattress matters.
The Constable's report is as follows (to be included with other officers' reports at all future meetings):
- Ray paraphrases the Odo quote now in the Psi Phi Constitution: "My own very adequate memory not being good enough for Psi Phi, I am pleased to put my voice to these minutes. The inmates are running the asylum; everything's under control. End log."
- The Constable also has the results from dilbert.com's list of the Worst Results From Failing to Look Busy. At #4 is "They put a civilian at your helm position...", and at #1 is "They make you wear a red shirt and send you down to the planet's surface."

The news about Marisa's kittens is repeated for anybody who missed it the first time.
Ray has a list of good sci-fi related websites. You can find them at his website, http://bobcat.bradley.edu/~rkremer/psiphi.htm.
Marisa knows of a good website that features a comic strip about computer geeks, but she can't remember the name.
Adam reports more good material is available at shlockmercenary.com, including "Step away from the bowl of happiness!"
David and Kenny present more "Takei: Secrets", as shown on Late Night with Conan O'Brien. This week's gems include calling Bill Shatner an "arrogant, conceited horse's ass," and a statement that every night Mr. Takei is "admiral of my bathtub."

David's news begins with a commentary. "If last night's Buffy doesn't get an Emmy nomination, there is no justice in the world."
The Captain hits himself.
The final six B5 episodes will be airing tomorrow through next Thursday on the Sci Fi Channel; Friday will feature "In the Beginning" at 5. The series starts over again Monday, March 12th, with "The Gathering."
Voyager, in three episodes from now (6-7 weeks), will make full sub-space radio contact with Earth. Yay!
A special exclusive is available at the website: Keith R.A. DeCandido has provided an audio clip of Chapter 2 of "Diplomatic Implausibility," as read by the author. So check it out!
Also, Nog will be the next new DS9 crew member featured on the site, being put up tomorrow.
As a prelude to adjournment, Adam makes inane annoying comments.

[Transmission Complete]
[Channel Closed]